Living in a tourist destination city, I have plenty of time to be stuck in traffic. That means I listen to a lot of talk radio. What I have discerned is that the common person is expected to be a good little lamb. We are to just go along with anything because tolerance has been touted as a must need virtue. When I complained to the condo authorities that I found it repulsive that spring breakers left stool and urine in the elevators, I was told we were to overlook and tolerate them because the city needs their money. When I try to get on the elevators with my kids, I am supposed to overlook the drunken, foul mouthed punks waiting on the elevator. And when I notice graffiti on the doors of the stairwell, one of the smiling suits told me it was "innocent", even though one clearly resembles graffiti attributed to the Crips.
Why do we as Americans tolerate stuff like this? I did a little research and found the combined Democrat and Republican Presidential race in 2012 cost more than $1.7 BILLION. Really? Could at least half of that moey been spent to do something, anything productive? But that would mean these wealthy contributors taking care of actual people and not their own special interests.
Why do Christians just sit and take the dung flung at them? Is it really a "turn the other cheek" activity or is it fear? Are we as Christians not supposed to rock the boat? Are we not to be confrontational? I was accused the other day of being too confrontational because I held drunken college students accountable for their language in front of my kids...at my house!
A few years ago, everyone wore WWJD bracelets. For some reason, people think Jesus was a wimp and was always passive. On the contrary, he was quite radical and confrontational. Ask the money changers he threw out of the Temple. Ask the religious leaders he challenged every day.
Our rights are being challenged daily in a country founded on freedom. Facts and opinions are twisted and torqued to fit the whim of whatever political side is trying to exploit it. Politicians, most of which have never had a real job, make decions that fit THEIR agenda. The politicians do not care and cannot relate to a normal person.
We, sadly, are like sheep. We follow mindlessly and no one comes up with real solutions. Common sense escaped years ago. Some of us are readily willing to allow illegal behavior and actually rally to show support of ILLEGAL activity.
WWJD? Yes, he would love all people. No, he would not love all behaviors, in fact, he called out certain behaviors. Again, ask the religious leaders if he called them out on certain behaviors and actions.
I just don't get it. I put a post on Facebook telling how almost $2 billion was spent on the Presidential election. That is a travesty. Could one of those busy body supporters have given money to fund the White House tours? I just don't get it, but I plan on being the one sheep bucking the idea of going into the pen. Who is with me?
Body..Mind..Heart...Soul
Showing posts with label journey. Show all posts
Showing posts with label journey. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Sunday, January 27, 2013
I Give Up....and that is how to win
Wow, it has been months since I have blogged. Hmm..let's recap. I have moved again, this time back to Panama City Beach. I have been very under-employed.. I have rarely looked at social media as most of it is not social, but political media. I have been humbled, if not humiliated by the events of life. I have laid pavers on the road of good intentions just to find roadblocks and traffic jams. It has given me too much time for self reflection.
I have been a good dad, and I have been a bad dad. The same could be said for my abilities as a husband, friend, nurse, employer and entrepreneur. I have consistently been a procrastinator and at the same time been a worrier. That's like being a diabetic and having a chocolate feast daily. I have been depressed and I admit in a very, very dark place the last couple of months. I mean a really dark place.
It dawned on me that there has been too much emphasis on "me". Look at the previous 2 paragraphs and you will see more than a dozen references to me. I am making a mess of my life. I have made decisions that have jeopardized my family's stability. Anytime there is that much "I " crap, selfishness rules.
My focus is out of whack. My rabbit ears needs some aluminum foil. Panic attacks began waking me in the middle of the night. I must say, being underemployed sucks. One morning, the scripture in Luke came to me. Luke 12:22-34 has been weighing on my mind a lot. Being the great procrastinator, I have been putting this off with the idea I can make things better. I sit here with the flu and I am publically admitting I am not capable of making anything better. I quit. I surrender.
And I will win! I am giving up the daily grind of life to God. He is not going to let me starve. He provided a job for me that starts in 2 days. I am one day closer to freedom. We all want freedom, whether it's financial freedom, freedom from worry, or freedom to bear arms. Humans desire freedom. I cannot produce freedom, and only God can provide true freedom. I have sadly seen so many Facebook arguments about the existence of God. I know He exists. That defines faith. I pray for those who mock believers. I even read a post where a guy called the disciples "sheep herders". That is expected and although I can make no sense of such comments, that person is free to believe that. I know and admit I have done a lot of terrible things but my faith tells me I am not perfect, yet I am forgiven by grace. Granted, I do not like it when others point out my sins, but they are sins regardless.
I don't know about you, but I want to be free from a lot of stuff. Stuff that gets in my way and stuff that may require supernatural intervention. I desire a true transformation. I guess I am back and I will chronicle my quest for transformation and freedom...Freedom Acquired through Supernatural Transformation.
I have been a good dad, and I have been a bad dad. The same could be said for my abilities as a husband, friend, nurse, employer and entrepreneur. I have consistently been a procrastinator and at the same time been a worrier. That's like being a diabetic and having a chocolate feast daily. I have been depressed and I admit in a very, very dark place the last couple of months. I mean a really dark place.
It dawned on me that there has been too much emphasis on "me". Look at the previous 2 paragraphs and you will see more than a dozen references to me. I am making a mess of my life. I have made decisions that have jeopardized my family's stability. Anytime there is that much "I " crap, selfishness rules.
My focus is out of whack. My rabbit ears needs some aluminum foil. Panic attacks began waking me in the middle of the night. I must say, being underemployed sucks. One morning, the scripture in Luke came to me. Luke 12:22-34 has been weighing on my mind a lot. Being the great procrastinator, I have been putting this off with the idea I can make things better. I sit here with the flu and I am publically admitting I am not capable of making anything better. I quit. I surrender.
And I will win! I am giving up the daily grind of life to God. He is not going to let me starve. He provided a job for me that starts in 2 days. I am one day closer to freedom. We all want freedom, whether it's financial freedom, freedom from worry, or freedom to bear arms. Humans desire freedom. I cannot produce freedom, and only God can provide true freedom. I have sadly seen so many Facebook arguments about the existence of God. I know He exists. That defines faith. I pray for those who mock believers. I even read a post where a guy called the disciples "sheep herders". That is expected and although I can make no sense of such comments, that person is free to believe that. I know and admit I have done a lot of terrible things but my faith tells me I am not perfect, yet I am forgiven by grace. Granted, I do not like it when others point out my sins, but they are sins regardless.
I don't know about you, but I want to be free from a lot of stuff. Stuff that gets in my way and stuff that may require supernatural intervention. I desire a true transformation. I guess I am back and I will chronicle my quest for transformation and freedom...Freedom Acquired through Supernatural Transformation.
Monday, November 5, 2012
Self Inflicted Nonsense
We had a weekend in which we were traveling quite a bit in the car. When that happens, I usually am a poor planner and we end up eating the dreaded fast food. Yes, I should know better, especially since I made a bold prediction of losing a boat load of weight. There is actually "good news" on that front. I had a couple of body compositions done using different formulas and my absolute lean body weight is 213 pounds. So, unless I amputate body parts, I will not be getting below 200 pounds anytime soon.
On Sunday morning, the exercise ritual began with a lot of aches and pains. The knots in my thighs were so huge and painful and referred pain into my hips. I set out on my bike ride after stretching and moving to get things loosened up a bit.
As I started on the bike, I thought to myself, "You know, the pain is your fault because of your food choices." I could not argue with myself. Everything I was feeling was certainly self inflicted. Self Inflicted NONsense..As I was pedaling, I shortened "self inflicted nonsense" to SIN.
What? SIN? And you know what? Sin is also self inflicted nonsense. Think about it for a second. No one forces us to sin. Take Adam and Eve for instance with the first sins against God. Adam TRIED to blame Eve but Adam was more than well aware of the instructions they had received from God. Adam did it to himself, or self inflicted the act. And, the act was for a nonsensical reason. Adam and Eve LIVED IN PARADISE. and they threw it all away for nothing.
The opportunity for us to sin WILL cross our path. There has not been a person yet who was not faced with sin. It can be a great big sin, or it can be a little, itsy bitsy sin. However, sin IS sin and it is not graded on size.
Now back to my muscle pain..I KNOW that my aches, pains and myofascial problems can be worsened with poor dietary choices. I know that eating with Kings and Clowns will only bring me down. Instead of planning and making a wise choice, I settled for the convenient choice and paid the consequences. I am talking about 20-30 minutes of hard labor with a foam roller and "The Stick" and take it from me, that is no fun.
Choices and consequences go a lot deeper than muscle pain. Kind David, like the rest of us, had a choice when it came to Bathsheeba. He could have walked away, but instead he really made a tangled mess of things. He certainly had consequences to his actions. If a person eats crap, then their legs will hurt and if a person commits a sin, then there will be a consequence and/or a punishment.
You know what is really bad? Chocolate tastes so sinfully good. It lures me in and I indulge only to feel the pain in the muscles and at the scales. Temptation is attractive. If sin was not attractive, we would never fall prey to it. Knowledge sounded good to Adam and Eve. It represented power. Temptation and sin will appeal to us on some level.
How do we deal with Self Inflicted Nonsense? First, we need to RECOGNIZE that it exists. The allure of cupcakes looms in my future and I must recognize that a cupcake will not kill me, but I can assure you that the foam roller will be needed. Next, I must UNDERSTAND my limitations. I know my weaknesses and need to know that I am vulnerable to those weaknesses. And finally, I need to firmly and emphatically say. "NO" because there is too much at stake. Oh, look, to deal with SIN (Self Inflicted Nonsense) a simple strategy is to RUN...sometimes as fast as one can.
On that note, I break in a new pair of running shoes in the morning..
On Sunday morning, the exercise ritual began with a lot of aches and pains. The knots in my thighs were so huge and painful and referred pain into my hips. I set out on my bike ride after stretching and moving to get things loosened up a bit.
As I started on the bike, I thought to myself, "You know, the pain is your fault because of your food choices." I could not argue with myself. Everything I was feeling was certainly self inflicted. Self Inflicted NONsense..As I was pedaling, I shortened "self inflicted nonsense" to SIN.
What? SIN? And you know what? Sin is also self inflicted nonsense. Think about it for a second. No one forces us to sin. Take Adam and Eve for instance with the first sins against God. Adam TRIED to blame Eve but Adam was more than well aware of the instructions they had received from God. Adam did it to himself, or self inflicted the act. And, the act was for a nonsensical reason. Adam and Eve LIVED IN PARADISE. and they threw it all away for nothing.
The opportunity for us to sin WILL cross our path. There has not been a person yet who was not faced with sin. It can be a great big sin, or it can be a little, itsy bitsy sin. However, sin IS sin and it is not graded on size.
Now back to my muscle pain..I KNOW that my aches, pains and myofascial problems can be worsened with poor dietary choices. I know that eating with Kings and Clowns will only bring me down. Instead of planning and making a wise choice, I settled for the convenient choice and paid the consequences. I am talking about 20-30 minutes of hard labor with a foam roller and "The Stick" and take it from me, that is no fun.
Choices and consequences go a lot deeper than muscle pain. Kind David, like the rest of us, had a choice when it came to Bathsheeba. He could have walked away, but instead he really made a tangled mess of things. He certainly had consequences to his actions. If a person eats crap, then their legs will hurt and if a person commits a sin, then there will be a consequence and/or a punishment.
You know what is really bad? Chocolate tastes so sinfully good. It lures me in and I indulge only to feel the pain in the muscles and at the scales. Temptation is attractive. If sin was not attractive, we would never fall prey to it. Knowledge sounded good to Adam and Eve. It represented power. Temptation and sin will appeal to us on some level.
How do we deal with Self Inflicted Nonsense? First, we need to RECOGNIZE that it exists. The allure of cupcakes looms in my future and I must recognize that a cupcake will not kill me, but I can assure you that the foam roller will be needed. Next, I must UNDERSTAND my limitations. I know my weaknesses and need to know that I am vulnerable to those weaknesses. And finally, I need to firmly and emphatically say. "NO" because there is too much at stake. Oh, look, to deal with SIN (Self Inflicted Nonsense) a simple strategy is to RUN...sometimes as fast as one can.
On that note, I break in a new pair of running shoes in the morning..
Sunday, October 28, 2012
Life is a Bycycle Ride
Sunday, October 28, 2012
0430
This is the time I started my Sunday morning ride. I am really fortunate that the young man who lives with us part time has a great bike he lets me use. I thought I had died and gone to heaven the first time I rode his Trek because all I had ever ridden were discount bikes. Heck, the cost of all my bikes together MIGHT buy a new tire for his Trek. I have been rediscovering the joy and exercise of riding a bike for a few weeks now. This morning, the plan was to ride 30 miles as I completed 25 miles last Sunday.
I go outside, turn my headlight on and my blinking seat and take out on my journey. Tropical storm Sandy, even though she is on the East Coast, provided us with the winds and gusts down here in South West Florida. I will be honest, about 3 miles into the trip, I was ready to turn around and call a 6 day trip a success. As I rationalized this lame decision, a still, small voice in my head said, "Go ahead; you always take the easy way out eventually."
I did the entire 30 miles as I planned. I fought headwinds, rejoiced in tail winds, and had an great workout. As I rode, I was enlightened on how a bike ride mimics life. This is what I came up with as I peddled a long way from home.
Sometimes, the trip of life is hard. As I peddled and ran into a strong gust of wind, my stroke would slow down, my legs would burn and I would slow down to a snail's pace. There I was, putting forth a good effort when the wind hit me and made me miserable. I was going nowhere and the sustained, leg burning effort started to become frustrating. Life does this, too. You get up, put in the same effort you did the last day of your "Groundhog's Day" life, and a gust of life hits you in the face.
Maybe it is the car giving you troubles. Maybe your kid has temporarily lost their mind and made a choice that makes no sense but affects your life. I can tell you from personal experience, a bike ride burns my legs, but life burns me somewhere a little more sensitive.
Sometimes, you have to change gears. Bad days require extra effort to say the least. In life, we find ourselves grinding it out during those terrible moments. Ever had a migraine headache and no sick days? Days like that make you gut one out for the team. A person just gears down and pushes through the obstacle or mountain life has thrown. On the other hand, when things are going great, jump into that higher gear and things really begin t take off for you.
Sometimes, you can coast. Slow down and smell the roses. The day is going well and you have some extra time, money or energy (Or on a special day, all 3). Coasting on a bike allows you to cover ground and not exert any energy to do it. I do not coast much as I am trying to use biking for exercise, but there are benefits when I do. First of all, I use a coast to stand up and get out of the saddle. My butt tends to like coasting. Secondly, I can really focus in on the scenery around me when I am coasting. For me, I ride in the dark and I never get tired of looking at the stars and the sky. Coasting in life allows one to take the pressure off on those things that are pains in your butt (see, I said bike riding and life are the same!)
If you give up before your final destination, you will never get there. Many times, the head winds of life cause us to give up on our dreams. It becomes too hard, the mountain too steep and the ride of life consumes too much energy. Instead of getting through the situation, we merely come out of the saddle and give up. I see 2 reasons to come out of the saddle. You can either come out just before you quit, or you can come out to put some real power in the stroke. It is easy to give up and takes courage to keep on going, even when it looks bleak and tiring.
So we know life is a highway (which has run through my mind since this idea came to me). Push through and look forward to coasting.
0430
This is the time I started my Sunday morning ride. I am really fortunate that the young man who lives with us part time has a great bike he lets me use. I thought I had died and gone to heaven the first time I rode his Trek because all I had ever ridden were discount bikes. Heck, the cost of all my bikes together MIGHT buy a new tire for his Trek. I have been rediscovering the joy and exercise of riding a bike for a few weeks now. This morning, the plan was to ride 30 miles as I completed 25 miles last Sunday.
I go outside, turn my headlight on and my blinking seat and take out on my journey. Tropical storm Sandy, even though she is on the East Coast, provided us with the winds and gusts down here in South West Florida. I will be honest, about 3 miles into the trip, I was ready to turn around and call a 6 day trip a success. As I rationalized this lame decision, a still, small voice in my head said, "Go ahead; you always take the easy way out eventually."
I did the entire 30 miles as I planned. I fought headwinds, rejoiced in tail winds, and had an great workout. As I rode, I was enlightened on how a bike ride mimics life. This is what I came up with as I peddled a long way from home.
Sometimes, the trip of life is hard. As I peddled and ran into a strong gust of wind, my stroke would slow down, my legs would burn and I would slow down to a snail's pace. There I was, putting forth a good effort when the wind hit me and made me miserable. I was going nowhere and the sustained, leg burning effort started to become frustrating. Life does this, too. You get up, put in the same effort you did the last day of your "Groundhog's Day" life, and a gust of life hits you in the face.
Maybe it is the car giving you troubles. Maybe your kid has temporarily lost their mind and made a choice that makes no sense but affects your life. I can tell you from personal experience, a bike ride burns my legs, but life burns me somewhere a little more sensitive.
Sometimes, you have to change gears. Bad days require extra effort to say the least. In life, we find ourselves grinding it out during those terrible moments. Ever had a migraine headache and no sick days? Days like that make you gut one out for the team. A person just gears down and pushes through the obstacle or mountain life has thrown. On the other hand, when things are going great, jump into that higher gear and things really begin t take off for you.
Sometimes, you can coast. Slow down and smell the roses. The day is going well and you have some extra time, money or energy (Or on a special day, all 3). Coasting on a bike allows you to cover ground and not exert any energy to do it. I do not coast much as I am trying to use biking for exercise, but there are benefits when I do. First of all, I use a coast to stand up and get out of the saddle. My butt tends to like coasting. Secondly, I can really focus in on the scenery around me when I am coasting. For me, I ride in the dark and I never get tired of looking at the stars and the sky. Coasting in life allows one to take the pressure off on those things that are pains in your butt (see, I said bike riding and life are the same!)
If you give up before your final destination, you will never get there. Many times, the head winds of life cause us to give up on our dreams. It becomes too hard, the mountain too steep and the ride of life consumes too much energy. Instead of getting through the situation, we merely come out of the saddle and give up. I see 2 reasons to come out of the saddle. You can either come out just before you quit, or you can come out to put some real power in the stroke. It is easy to give up and takes courage to keep on going, even when it looks bleak and tiring.
So we know life is a highway (which has run through my mind since this idea came to me). Push through and look forward to coasting.
Tuesday, October 23, 2012
Less weight=less depresion
I have put my big mouth to the test and have made a public challenge to lose 100 pounds. I know, what was I thinking? No more cakes and pies. No more "good stuff" that makes me feel so bad. Ugh. Another one of those things in life that a person has to give up, even if they enjoy it.
In order to try and keep myself motivated, I thought I would look at the reasons I decided to to this. I have worked most of my life in the mental health field. I have seen thousands of people suffer from depression. Since I have been a nurse since 1986, I have seen thousands and thousands of people who suffered from obesity. I see this one guy every single day. He looks back at me from the mirror. Do not tell him, but I noticed he has a bit of a growing bald spot too.
Are depression and obesity related? For this, I went to the medical literature data base called "Pubmed". I am not an affiliate and I do not get a penny from them, but this is my "go to" site for information. The search alone for "obesity depression" landed 3458 references. That tells me there MIGHT be an association of the two.
A study is cited from the Finnish Research Center for Sport and Health Science. The abstract looks at the presence of low grade inflammation and depression as it pertains to ABDOMINAL FAT. Seriously, are there two more horrible words than "ABDOMINAL FAT"? Call me any name you want, just do not call me "Abdominal Fat". The study supports that the two evil doers (inflammation and depression) put a guy at more risk to develop "AF". I cannot help but digress a bit more down the road as it reminds me of the movie "Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid", when Steve Martin hears "cleaning woman"...
Abdominal fat leads to even more medical problems as it has been linked to increased incidence of diabetes and cardiac disease. But, the good news is found in Pubmed. The following is from an abstract found in the American Journal of Psychiatry September 2011 edition (hey, see, I bring you the BEST information)
"The association of depressive symptoms with subsequent inflammation levels was eliminated after adjustment for health behaviors associated with depression-physical inactivity, smoking, and higher body mass index."
So, in other words, if a body gets physically fit, then depression will have the possibility to improve. Depression affects the lives of so many on so many levels. Anything that helps battle depression makes a difference. Now, I changed my search criteria just a bit. I did a search for "childhood obesity". Sadly, it registered 7921 hits. We often hear about the impact now and the future impact of childhood obesity. Considering what we covered in this blog, realize that depression will have a great foothold on our future as a country.
I know it is election time and we are forced to listen to all of the politicians spout off the thought of the day. We can take control of healthcare by taking it on one person at a time and go after obesity with a vengeance. I will help you. I am not one of those skinny people who preach about the evils of obesity. I live with the disease daily and am fighting it pretty hard these day.
I hope this educates one person.
John
In order to try and keep myself motivated, I thought I would look at the reasons I decided to to this. I have worked most of my life in the mental health field. I have seen thousands of people suffer from depression. Since I have been a nurse since 1986, I have seen thousands and thousands of people who suffered from obesity. I see this one guy every single day. He looks back at me from the mirror. Do not tell him, but I noticed he has a bit of a growing bald spot too.
Are depression and obesity related? For this, I went to the medical literature data base called "Pubmed". I am not an affiliate and I do not get a penny from them, but this is my "go to" site for information. The search alone for "obesity depression" landed 3458 references. That tells me there MIGHT be an association of the two.
A study is cited from the Finnish Research Center for Sport and Health Science. The abstract looks at the presence of low grade inflammation and depression as it pertains to ABDOMINAL FAT. Seriously, are there two more horrible words than "ABDOMINAL FAT"? Call me any name you want, just do not call me "Abdominal Fat". The study supports that the two evil doers (inflammation and depression) put a guy at more risk to develop "AF". I cannot help but digress a bit more down the road as it reminds me of the movie "Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid", when Steve Martin hears "cleaning woman"...
Abdominal fat leads to even more medical problems as it has been linked to increased incidence of diabetes and cardiac disease. But, the good news is found in Pubmed. The following is from an abstract found in the American Journal of Psychiatry September 2011 edition (hey, see, I bring you the BEST information)
"The association of depressive symptoms with subsequent inflammation levels was eliminated after adjustment for health behaviors associated with depression-physical inactivity, smoking, and higher body mass index."
So, in other words, if a body gets physically fit, then depression will have the possibility to improve. Depression affects the lives of so many on so many levels. Anything that helps battle depression makes a difference. Now, I changed my search criteria just a bit. I did a search for "childhood obesity". Sadly, it registered 7921 hits. We often hear about the impact now and the future impact of childhood obesity. Considering what we covered in this blog, realize that depression will have a great foothold on our future as a country.
I know it is election time and we are forced to listen to all of the politicians spout off the thought of the day. We can take control of healthcare by taking it on one person at a time and go after obesity with a vengeance. I will help you. I am not one of those skinny people who preach about the evils of obesity. I live with the disease daily and am fighting it pretty hard these day.
I hope this educates one person.
John
Monday, October 8, 2012
Accountability WIth a Twist
No one could ever accuse me of seeing the world in a cookie cutter way. If the first step is acknowledgement, then I accept that I am not right, or as they say back home, "I ain't right.". Even though I am a bubble and a half off plumb, I need goals and I certainly need accountability.
I possess an advanced degree in procrastination. It took me a while to get that degree as I kept putting off the work. In a sense, that caused me to receive the degree with honors. Obviously, it comes into play in meeting any business dream I might have. I could go on and bore you with hours of details showing how I have put off doing things. Why do I put things off like I do? I am not totally sure. Maybe part of me enjoys misery, stress and worry. I am certain that fear puts me down all the time. Yesterday, the Biblical parable of the servants and talents hit me like a ton of bricks. FEAR kept the one servant from investing or taking care of the 'talent' (asset) that the master gave to him. FEAR led him to be called "lazy" and, as the CEV states, "good for nothing". If any of you are like me and fight esteem issues, the last thing I need is my prowess of procrastination prompting someone to call me 'lazy'.
I am a great dreamer and goal setter. I find following through difficult because of fear and some other things. I have brainstormed a few unique ways to encourage accountability.
1. Tell others your goal. I do not mean just write it down in a journal (a great idea, by the way). I mean yell it from the mountaintops, or better yet, post it on the modern day mountain tops-Facebook and/or Twitter. Lay it out there. See who the supporters are in your life and weed out the haters. If your dream or goal means that much to you and you add in your post a simple "why" statement, then your true friends and supporters will be unable to at least click "like". Silence speaks volumes and those who do not respond are merely nosey and not what you need.
2. Use your common SENSE(S) This is where it gets unique to the inner workings of my mind. Senses guide our life and much of this guidance is done without any conscious thought. You smell and see the "HOT NOW" sign on the Krispy Kreme store and your mouth and stomach get the message immediately. Why not use that sense recognition for good?
Let's look at a "body" goal. People have used motivational pictures of how they want to look for years and visualization has long been encouraged. The sense of sight helps out here in the quest for the beach worthy body. How about smell? One could easily keep a bottle of coconut scented tanning oil nearby so a quick snort could keep them on track. Sense of sound is included with simple affirmations repeated that one finds encouraging. The sense of taste proves a little trickier. Sure, a mouth full of sand would prompt visions of the beach, but instead, savoring and enjoying the tastes of healthy food. If you do not find healthy food attractive, I know a way to change that..And finally, the sense of touch. I see this one with huge potential. How about a simple band around your wrist? You feel it and that could hold you accountable when after that dang brownie jumped right into your hand. I have heard of people shaving their heads as a reminder that they need to be focused.
There you have it. A couple simple ways to help with accountability. There are other, more traditional ways, like finding an accountability partner and the aforementioned journaling. In a couple of days, I am putting this to the test in a very public way.
I possess an advanced degree in procrastination. It took me a while to get that degree as I kept putting off the work. In a sense, that caused me to receive the degree with honors. Obviously, it comes into play in meeting any business dream I might have. I could go on and bore you with hours of details showing how I have put off doing things. Why do I put things off like I do? I am not totally sure. Maybe part of me enjoys misery, stress and worry. I am certain that fear puts me down all the time. Yesterday, the Biblical parable of the servants and talents hit me like a ton of bricks. FEAR kept the one servant from investing or taking care of the 'talent' (asset) that the master gave to him. FEAR led him to be called "lazy" and, as the CEV states, "good for nothing". If any of you are like me and fight esteem issues, the last thing I need is my prowess of procrastination prompting someone to call me 'lazy'.
I am a great dreamer and goal setter. I find following through difficult because of fear and some other things. I have brainstormed a few unique ways to encourage accountability.
1. Tell others your goal. I do not mean just write it down in a journal (a great idea, by the way). I mean yell it from the mountaintops, or better yet, post it on the modern day mountain tops-Facebook and/or Twitter. Lay it out there. See who the supporters are in your life and weed out the haters. If your dream or goal means that much to you and you add in your post a simple "why" statement, then your true friends and supporters will be unable to at least click "like". Silence speaks volumes and those who do not respond are merely nosey and not what you need.
2. Use your common SENSE(S) This is where it gets unique to the inner workings of my mind. Senses guide our life and much of this guidance is done without any conscious thought. You smell and see the "HOT NOW" sign on the Krispy Kreme store and your mouth and stomach get the message immediately. Why not use that sense recognition for good?
Let's look at a "body" goal. People have used motivational pictures of how they want to look for years and visualization has long been encouraged. The sense of sight helps out here in the quest for the beach worthy body. How about smell? One could easily keep a bottle of coconut scented tanning oil nearby so a quick snort could keep them on track. Sense of sound is included with simple affirmations repeated that one finds encouraging. The sense of taste proves a little trickier. Sure, a mouth full of sand would prompt visions of the beach, but instead, savoring and enjoying the tastes of healthy food. If you do not find healthy food attractive, I know a way to change that..And finally, the sense of touch. I see this one with huge potential. How about a simple band around your wrist? You feel it and that could hold you accountable when after that dang brownie jumped right into your hand. I have heard of people shaving their heads as a reminder that they need to be focused.
There you have it. A couple simple ways to help with accountability. There are other, more traditional ways, like finding an accountability partner and the aforementioned journaling. In a couple of days, I am putting this to the test in a very public way.
Saturday, October 6, 2012
Ready, set ACTION
Roll up your sleeves, tighten your belt and take a big snort of ammonia, it is time to get things started. You and I want change, but not change for change sake. We want a defined change and we want that change to redefine our life. Since we want the change, then all we have to do is say "poof" and it will happen. OK, that was far fetched a bit so all we have to do is pray about it and God will make it happen. Again, God is not a Genie in a bottle nor is He Santa Claus. Well, dang, the easy, no sweat ways won't work so how do we take action.
By now, you know I like things that run in threes--Stooges, strikes, Musketeers, etc. As for taking action, yep, I have got a 3 step plan.
DREAM
All good action plans begin with a dream. I find that people (including me) tend to dream way to small. The best part of a dream is that it can be huge. There should be no limits to a dream. Take for instance a bench press. Let's say that you have 100 workouts in a year and you start at a reasonable weight. In most gyms or the weights sold in stores, the smallest weights available are 2.5 pounds. The weight you select is easy enough to do 10 times without much effort. Every other workout, you put the weight equivalent to a sack of sugar on the bar. In other words, you will add 5 pounds every other workout (or 50 workouts) in a year. In theory, that would yield a 250 pound increase. Now some of you are screaming, "John that is not possible." I ask you to tell me why it is impossible. What if you only reached half that amount a year (125 pound increase) and you did this for 2 years (the same impossible weight in 2 years). Again, even if you only met that by 50% you will still have a 190 pound increase in 2 years. I have heard people say "shoot for the stars and you may still hit the moon". Do not suppress your dreams. And write them down. We will learn how to use that against you later.
GOALS
From dreams come goals. I see goals as the stepping stones to reach your dreams. Setting goals deserves a full blog to do it justice. Goals must be small, measurable and obtainable and once they are reached, can serve as a springboard for the next goal. The old adage "Inch by inch is a cinch and yard by yard is hard" fits here. Maybe the goal is to read your Bible 10 minutes a day. This may seem like an insurmountable goal but build on what you can do. For instance, maybe it is read a chapter a day and increase a chapter every week. It will be no time that you are reading those 10 minutes or more. I had a patient once that said she could not get out of bed in the morning. She started by setting the alarm and forcing herself to walk out of the bedroom. Sure, for a week or so she immediately crashed on the couch but she applied the same approach and eventually found herself walking to the mailbox. Her "dream" is to walk with her husband in the mornings and she is a lot closer than she was in the beginning.
RESOLVE
Good ol' Stonewall Jackson comes in again to save the day. As mentioned in previous entries, I do like me some Stonewall. "Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve". This sort of explains New Years Resolutions. We START with the dream and the goal, and then resolve to make the change. For me, they usually last until about 9pm New Year's Day. Resolve takes, well, resolve. Resolving to change takes hard work and dare I say, accountability. Accountability requires creativity and the next blog will show some creative ways that I plan on injecting accountability into my life.
What are your dreams? Can you manufacture goals to reach them? Then what are you willing to do to reach your dreams (that is where we get stuck)
By now, you know I like things that run in threes--Stooges, strikes, Musketeers, etc. As for taking action, yep, I have got a 3 step plan.
DREAM
All good action plans begin with a dream. I find that people (including me) tend to dream way to small. The best part of a dream is that it can be huge. There should be no limits to a dream. Take for instance a bench press. Let's say that you have 100 workouts in a year and you start at a reasonable weight. In most gyms or the weights sold in stores, the smallest weights available are 2.5 pounds. The weight you select is easy enough to do 10 times without much effort. Every other workout, you put the weight equivalent to a sack of sugar on the bar. In other words, you will add 5 pounds every other workout (or 50 workouts) in a year. In theory, that would yield a 250 pound increase. Now some of you are screaming, "John that is not possible." I ask you to tell me why it is impossible. What if you only reached half that amount a year (125 pound increase) and you did this for 2 years (the same impossible weight in 2 years). Again, even if you only met that by 50% you will still have a 190 pound increase in 2 years. I have heard people say "shoot for the stars and you may still hit the moon". Do not suppress your dreams. And write them down. We will learn how to use that against you later.
GOALS
From dreams come goals. I see goals as the stepping stones to reach your dreams. Setting goals deserves a full blog to do it justice. Goals must be small, measurable and obtainable and once they are reached, can serve as a springboard for the next goal. The old adage "Inch by inch is a cinch and yard by yard is hard" fits here. Maybe the goal is to read your Bible 10 minutes a day. This may seem like an insurmountable goal but build on what you can do. For instance, maybe it is read a chapter a day and increase a chapter every week. It will be no time that you are reading those 10 minutes or more. I had a patient once that said she could not get out of bed in the morning. She started by setting the alarm and forcing herself to walk out of the bedroom. Sure, for a week or so she immediately crashed on the couch but she applied the same approach and eventually found herself walking to the mailbox. Her "dream" is to walk with her husband in the mornings and she is a lot closer than she was in the beginning.
RESOLVE
Good ol' Stonewall Jackson comes in again to save the day. As mentioned in previous entries, I do like me some Stonewall. "Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve". This sort of explains New Years Resolutions. We START with the dream and the goal, and then resolve to make the change. For me, they usually last until about 9pm New Year's Day. Resolve takes, well, resolve. Resolving to change takes hard work and dare I say, accountability. Accountability requires creativity and the next blog will show some creative ways that I plan on injecting accountability into my life.
What are your dreams? Can you manufacture goals to reach them? Then what are you willing to do to reach your dreams (that is where we get stuck)
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
It's easy as A B C..lifestyle, that is.,,
I am channeling my young, inner Mike Jackson here and going to simplify my approach to a healthy life style. The framework for my "being" is defined by this blog. A person has 4 distinct dimensions: Heart, soul, mind, and body. The simple ABCs will be applied to each of the dimensions. All that discussion is gravy so let's get to the meat and potatoes of today, which is the ABC.
A lifestyle change is a big deal. Heck, just about any change more involved than changing underwear can be a big deal. Change, or the process of change, alters life. When a young 18 year old goes off to college and is introduced to freedom, they end up dancing on a table wearing a lampshade. When a young couple gets married and have to live with another person and share the same bathroom, that change affects them. True change in a young marriage comes when the passing of gas flows freely without inhibition between the 2 parties.
I digress. It is suffice to say without any more flatus innuendos that change of any kind needs a plan or format. We all learned our ABCs at an early age. We can usually remember our ABCs. I will take advantage of that and explain the needed parts of a lifestyle change.
A. "A" is for the Action that is required. For instance, the Body Dimension requires action in the form of activity in order to thrive. Action makes things happen. Things happening result in change. There are certainly barriers to action, like fear, low self esteem or a lack of confidence.
B. "B" is for the Balance needed to keep the peace. Just like Yin and Yang, Scooby and Shaggy, and Peace and Quiet, there must be a balance in a lifestyle. Too much emphasis in one of the 4 dimensions means that another dimension will suffer. Then your dimension will look like one of those guys in the gym who have bench pressed heavily for years but the thought the squat rack was for decoration. The "upper body giants" look ridiculous when they wear shorts. Zoiks!!
C. "C" means Consistency. I can raise my hand and say AMEN when I talk about the previous inconsistent changes I have made in my life. I have been consistently inconsistent in regards to diet, exercise and a million other projects.Consistency, when done appropriately, naturally builds in accountability.
See, as easy as ABC..I will resist the Michael Jackson puns I could throw out there. In upcoming blogs, I will dig deeper into the application of the ABCs.
A lifestyle change is a big deal. Heck, just about any change more involved than changing underwear can be a big deal. Change, or the process of change, alters life. When a young 18 year old goes off to college and is introduced to freedom, they end up dancing on a table wearing a lampshade. When a young couple gets married and have to live with another person and share the same bathroom, that change affects them. True change in a young marriage comes when the passing of gas flows freely without inhibition between the 2 parties.
I digress. It is suffice to say without any more flatus innuendos that change of any kind needs a plan or format. We all learned our ABCs at an early age. We can usually remember our ABCs. I will take advantage of that and explain the needed parts of a lifestyle change.
A. "A" is for the Action that is required. For instance, the Body Dimension requires action in the form of activity in order to thrive. Action makes things happen. Things happening result in change. There are certainly barriers to action, like fear, low self esteem or a lack of confidence.
B. "B" is for the Balance needed to keep the peace. Just like Yin and Yang, Scooby and Shaggy, and Peace and Quiet, there must be a balance in a lifestyle. Too much emphasis in one of the 4 dimensions means that another dimension will suffer. Then your dimension will look like one of those guys in the gym who have bench pressed heavily for years but the thought the squat rack was for decoration. The "upper body giants" look ridiculous when they wear shorts. Zoiks!!
C. "C" means Consistency. I can raise my hand and say AMEN when I talk about the previous inconsistent changes I have made in my life. I have been consistently inconsistent in regards to diet, exercise and a million other projects.Consistency, when done appropriately, naturally builds in accountability.
See, as easy as ABC..I will resist the Michael Jackson puns I could throw out there. In upcoming blogs, I will dig deeper into the application of the ABCs.
Monday, July 2, 2012
Genesis and 5 thoughts for goal setting
The Bible leads off with "In the beginning". For a moment, let us take Christianity and Judaism out of the equation. Even the staunchest of Atheists would have to recognize that the Bible, in one form or another, has been around a long time. The Bible's longevity defies understanding as so many other things such as cultures, empires and ways of life have come and gone. There have been billions of copies throughout the ages and this all time best seller started with those 3 simple words.
The beginning of the Bible describes the formation stage of our earth and our universe. God's plans and actions are spelled out and defined. Creation. Wow, that one word carries a lot of weight.
Daily, we go about our lives creating things in our little worlds. Think of the the catch phrases and cliches that revolve around creation. Are you creating new opportunities or are you creating a new product? Maybe you are exercising in the creative arts or praising a new favorite artist for their creativity. Football season is coming and we will hear about how Tim Tebow can create quickly on his feet when 11 guys are trying to catch him. I am sitting here in the dark at 5:30am trying to create a blog that has more than eleven subscribers. (I'm just saying. I suppose that is 77 in dog subscribers, huh?)
Now that we have determined that creation lives all around us, we must look at goal setting. I remember in the 1980s when meetings were held all the time about everything. Guru after guru peddled their "creative" approach to goal setting. Hour after hour were spent reading books, listening to tapes or attending lectures where we all wore "Hi, my name is ___". Each expert put their spin on the topic of goal setting. Many of these gurus are still around and even more are no longer relevant. I guess they did not apply their goal setting to long term goals. And, there is one thing still alive and kicking-The BIBLE.
The way I see it, the wheel does not need invented. Why don't we use what we can find just about anywhere to help us how to set goals for creating something? Hey, if the plan worked for creating the world, surely we can apply it to starting a small business or creating a great meal. Here are 5 lessons we can use and apply from Genesis 1.
1. GET busy! Genesis 1:1 says that God created the heavens and the earth. There were no warm up verses and it does not say that God procrastinated and got started the next morning after a good nights sleep. It does not say that God waited as He analyzed the next step. God got busy. He created. By using the word "created" God took action. So many times, we have great intentions but we NEVER DO ANYTHING. Action produces results. Great intentions create NOTHING. Oh I know, I do not like making mistakes either and if I just make sure everything is just right, then success will follow.
2. Be realistic. God did not make the world and universe in one day. I have no idea why he did not but can make at least one solid argument. The Bible teaches us how to handle life. The Bible answers many questions and can be applied to an endless number of situations. By creating everything in a number of days, God teaches us that creating ANYTHING special takes time. But, what does taking time show us? It shows us the meaning of persistence, consistency in effort, and it allows us to ask God for guidance because He, too, has built things over time.
3. Have a plan. Ah, this takes me back to the "Guru Days of Old". It was Stephen Covey who wrote "Begin with the end in mind." Although we do not have access to God's business plan or blueprint for the creation of EVERYTHING, it makes sense to me that He had a plan. Man was not made first. If he would have created man first, then secondly he would have had to create a life jacket so the oceans could be created. We have ideas and strive to create. Maybe you want to create the dream life. If you do, how do you see the ending?
4. Evaluate your work as you go. After God created light, He was pleased.Now go read that first chapter of Genesis and you will see for yourself that after God created, He evaluated His work. Take time to look at what you are making and creating. Do this as you go so that you can make changes and adaptations to your creation. Life does not offer us many "re do" situations. We cannot just jump in and make a mess of something so that we can start all over again. I know, some people seem to do this over and over, but life is way too short.
5. Rest. Seriously, God took a day off. True, it was His LAST day off, but once man was created and acted a fool, God has no one else to mind the store. Again, the Bible TEACHES us here as God does not need a day off, but He knows we do. I have been guilty of overlooking this. In my work past, 2 days off from one job gave me the opportunity to work another job. I did this so I could pursue the American Dream but ended up with a long chapter of my life that had nightmarish consequences. I guess that is why God created light first, so we could see where we are going if we open our eyes.
I have given you a brief little lesson on goal setting. Please take off your "Hello, my name is ___" sticker.For those of you who did that, seek help. I will not be holding an 8 hour seminar on Genesis Goal Setting...oh, but wait, maybe I will. Then I could sell tapes and books. I must go on line and order a bunch of name tags.
The beginning of the Bible describes the formation stage of our earth and our universe. God's plans and actions are spelled out and defined. Creation. Wow, that one word carries a lot of weight.
Daily, we go about our lives creating things in our little worlds. Think of the the catch phrases and cliches that revolve around creation. Are you creating new opportunities or are you creating a new product? Maybe you are exercising in the creative arts or praising a new favorite artist for their creativity. Football season is coming and we will hear about how Tim Tebow can create quickly on his feet when 11 guys are trying to catch him. I am sitting here in the dark at 5:30am trying to create a blog that has more than eleven subscribers. (I'm just saying. I suppose that is 77 in dog subscribers, huh?)
Now that we have determined that creation lives all around us, we must look at goal setting. I remember in the 1980s when meetings were held all the time about everything. Guru after guru peddled their "creative" approach to goal setting. Hour after hour were spent reading books, listening to tapes or attending lectures where we all wore "Hi, my name is ___". Each expert put their spin on the topic of goal setting. Many of these gurus are still around and even more are no longer relevant. I guess they did not apply their goal setting to long term goals. And, there is one thing still alive and kicking-The BIBLE.
The way I see it, the wheel does not need invented. Why don't we use what we can find just about anywhere to help us how to set goals for creating something? Hey, if the plan worked for creating the world, surely we can apply it to starting a small business or creating a great meal. Here are 5 lessons we can use and apply from Genesis 1.
1. GET busy! Genesis 1:1 says that God created the heavens and the earth. There were no warm up verses and it does not say that God procrastinated and got started the next morning after a good nights sleep. It does not say that God waited as He analyzed the next step. God got busy. He created. By using the word "created" God took action. So many times, we have great intentions but we NEVER DO ANYTHING. Action produces results. Great intentions create NOTHING. Oh I know, I do not like making mistakes either and if I just make sure everything is just right, then success will follow.
2. Be realistic. God did not make the world and universe in one day. I have no idea why he did not but can make at least one solid argument. The Bible teaches us how to handle life. The Bible answers many questions and can be applied to an endless number of situations. By creating everything in a number of days, God teaches us that creating ANYTHING special takes time. But, what does taking time show us? It shows us the meaning of persistence, consistency in effort, and it allows us to ask God for guidance because He, too, has built things over time.
3. Have a plan. Ah, this takes me back to the "Guru Days of Old". It was Stephen Covey who wrote "Begin with the end in mind." Although we do not have access to God's business plan or blueprint for the creation of EVERYTHING, it makes sense to me that He had a plan. Man was not made first. If he would have created man first, then secondly he would have had to create a life jacket so the oceans could be created. We have ideas and strive to create. Maybe you want to create the dream life. If you do, how do you see the ending?
4. Evaluate your work as you go. After God created light, He was pleased.Now go read that first chapter of Genesis and you will see for yourself that after God created, He evaluated His work. Take time to look at what you are making and creating. Do this as you go so that you can make changes and adaptations to your creation. Life does not offer us many "re do" situations. We cannot just jump in and make a mess of something so that we can start all over again. I know, some people seem to do this over and over, but life is way too short.
5. Rest. Seriously, God took a day off. True, it was His LAST day off, but once man was created and acted a fool, God has no one else to mind the store. Again, the Bible TEACHES us here as God does not need a day off, but He knows we do. I have been guilty of overlooking this. In my work past, 2 days off from one job gave me the opportunity to work another job. I did this so I could pursue the American Dream but ended up with a long chapter of my life that had nightmarish consequences. I guess that is why God created light first, so we could see where we are going if we open our eyes.
I have given you a brief little lesson on goal setting. Please take off your "Hello, my name is ___" sticker.For those of you who did that, seek help. I will not be holding an 8 hour seminar on Genesis Goal Setting...oh, but wait, maybe I will. Then I could sell tapes and books. I must go on line and order a bunch of name tags.
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Life According to Ralphie Parker
Who makes late June reference to the Christmas classic A Christmas Story? Ralphie Parker can teach us all about life in 3 simple steps.
LESSON 1: Remember the scene with the bully Scut Farkas? Ralphie tells us that ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. I am not advocating beating a bully until his nose bleeds but hang with me when we apply that to life. We all have a single life to live. I can speak for me and say I know I do not make the best of it some days. Life is like Farkas and steals our lunch money and makes us scream "Uncle" when our life is twisted into a chicken wing. We all say, "Tomorrow will be different" or "Tomorrow I will start the diet."All that does ia give us permission to undermine our goals by taking advantage of the gas station sale of 2 extra large candy bars for the price of one. Seriously, I am only being a conscientious shopper and I will save one for later (if you really want to believe that).
Ralphie could not take the stress of the bully anymore and he emptied a big ol can of whoop butt on Farkas. When we decide to finally do something, we can change our lives. Like one of my favorite authors Tim Ferriss says, ""Pure hell forces action, but anything less can be endured with enough rationalization."
So, it is that easy huh? I mean, I am frustrated beyond belief that I have not acheived the level of success I want to in all my endeavors. Sure, I talk about change and I can freely type about change but deep down, I realize that Scut Farkas could have whooped Ralphie in an old fashioned, school yard fashion. Why did Ralphie do it?
LESSON 2: Ralphie stopped thinking and JUST DID IT. This trips a lot of us up and keeps us stuck in the storm ditch of life. I have heard the saying "paralysis by analysis", meaning that inaction will result if we continually sit and look at all the possibilities. What if I left the security of a JOB and ventured out with an understanding collaborative doc and built a practice based on "me" and my abilities? See, then I will see my self like Ralphie selling pencils but not from soap poisoning but from a waiting room full of crickets chirping. People who really know me know I am "THE idea guy". I have great ideas and know I possess the ability to brainstorm. I have quite the inventory of ideas. All are SAFELY placed on a shelf so I can commiserate about them when I am really old. Think how pitiful (if not pathetic) it would be if we allowed our plans and ideas to dry rot sitting on that shelf. Maybe our dreams would touch the lives of others and not only bless those around us, but also change their lives.
LESSON 3: NEVER forget what you want, even if it could put your eye out. Remember, the dang gun almost did put his eye out! But, you know what? IT DID NOT and he enjoyed the fruits of his dreaming labor. Ralphie never lost sight (pun intended) of what he really wanted.
I guess, for this to happen, a person has to really know what they want. That desire almost becomes a mission statement for your life. I have FINALLY learned that I must pursue my dream like an occupation or career. If you don't, you end up treating your dream like a hobby and a person can surely live without fullfilling their "hobby dreams". Also note that I said "I must pursue" these dreams and I mean that NO ONE else is as committed to your dreams as you are. More often than not, help is NOT on the way. To get the boulder of life moving, one must exert lots of effort. As the dreaded Ms. Trunchbull from Matilda said
" The distance the shotput goes, depends upon the effort that you PUT INTO IT. PERSPIRATION!"
One life is all we have. We can choose to live (which is far from safe and has many risks) or we can exist (which is safer but less rewarding). One takes courage and the other only requires a pulse. The choice of living is easy to talk about and hard to do while existing is tough to swallow but easy to do.
Wow, this ended up deeper than I intended. Leave it to me to rain on a Christmas classic. What is your favorite scene of the movie and can you relate to Ralphie?
LESSON 1: Remember the scene with the bully Scut Farkas? Ralphie tells us that ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. I am not advocating beating a bully until his nose bleeds but hang with me when we apply that to life. We all have a single life to live. I can speak for me and say I know I do not make the best of it some days. Life is like Farkas and steals our lunch money and makes us scream "Uncle" when our life is twisted into a chicken wing. We all say, "Tomorrow will be different" or "Tomorrow I will start the diet."All that does ia give us permission to undermine our goals by taking advantage of the gas station sale of 2 extra large candy bars for the price of one. Seriously, I am only being a conscientious shopper and I will save one for later (if you really want to believe that).
Ralphie could not take the stress of the bully anymore and he emptied a big ol can of whoop butt on Farkas. When we decide to finally do something, we can change our lives. Like one of my favorite authors Tim Ferriss says, ""Pure hell forces action, but anything less can be endured with enough rationalization."
So, it is that easy huh? I mean, I am frustrated beyond belief that I have not acheived the level of success I want to in all my endeavors. Sure, I talk about change and I can freely type about change but deep down, I realize that Scut Farkas could have whooped Ralphie in an old fashioned, school yard fashion. Why did Ralphie do it?
LESSON 2: Ralphie stopped thinking and JUST DID IT. This trips a lot of us up and keeps us stuck in the storm ditch of life. I have heard the saying "paralysis by analysis", meaning that inaction will result if we continually sit and look at all the possibilities. What if I left the security of a JOB and ventured out with an understanding collaborative doc and built a practice based on "me" and my abilities? See, then I will see my self like Ralphie selling pencils but not from soap poisoning but from a waiting room full of crickets chirping. People who really know me know I am "THE idea guy". I have great ideas and know I possess the ability to brainstorm. I have quite the inventory of ideas. All are SAFELY placed on a shelf so I can commiserate about them when I am really old. Think how pitiful (if not pathetic) it would be if we allowed our plans and ideas to dry rot sitting on that shelf. Maybe our dreams would touch the lives of others and not only bless those around us, but also change their lives.
LESSON 3: NEVER forget what you want, even if it could put your eye out. Remember, the dang gun almost did put his eye out! But, you know what? IT DID NOT and he enjoyed the fruits of his dreaming labor. Ralphie never lost sight (pun intended) of what he really wanted.
I guess, for this to happen, a person has to really know what they want. That desire almost becomes a mission statement for your life. I have FINALLY learned that I must pursue my dream like an occupation or career. If you don't, you end up treating your dream like a hobby and a person can surely live without fullfilling their "hobby dreams". Also note that I said "I must pursue" these dreams and I mean that NO ONE else is as committed to your dreams as you are. More often than not, help is NOT on the way. To get the boulder of life moving, one must exert lots of effort. As the dreaded Ms. Trunchbull from Matilda said
" The distance the shotput goes, depends upon the effort that you PUT INTO IT. PERSPIRATION!"
One life is all we have. We can choose to live (which is far from safe and has many risks) or we can exist (which is safer but less rewarding). One takes courage and the other only requires a pulse. The choice of living is easy to talk about and hard to do while existing is tough to swallow but easy to do.
Wow, this ended up deeper than I intended. Leave it to me to rain on a Christmas classic. What is your favorite scene of the movie and can you relate to Ralphie?
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Stonewall, Coach and Jesus
It has been a while since I posted and the title looks as if the heat of Florida has finally gotten to me. I am a big self reflector. Sometimes that is healthy and sometimes merely aggravating. This time, I am not sure which one it is but the focus of my soul searching revolves around effort. For instance, my blogs have been scarce lately and that all falls on me. My real estate activity recently has been lower than expected and, well, my real estate efforts have been less than active. I am beginning to see a correlation between effort and results. And I did not need my Sherlock Holmes hat.
But why and how does that pertain to the title of the blog. I am referring to Stonewall Jackson, John Wooden and, well, Jesus Christ. I suppose that one was a given huh?
Stonewall Jackson, an iconic Confederate General, led an interesting life in addition to many men to victory. To say he was eccentric would be like saying LeBron James plays a little ball. He sucked on lemons, felt pepper was not good for his health and memorized the lectures he gave while teaching. He had a couple of sayings that I think certainly can drive home the importance of effort.
1. MYSTIFY AND MISLEAD THE ENEMY
You will run into naysayers, critics and downright mean people. How you deal with them will determine if you let their evil intentions rob you of your zealous intentions. Remember this Stonewall-ism when we get to the last guy.
2. RESOLVE TO PERFORM WHAT YOU OUGHT; PERFORM WITHOUT FAIL WHAT YOU RESOLVE
So basically, do what you feel is worthy and useful and do not let anyone or anything stop you. Maybe it is an athletic pursuit. Maybe it is looking for a job. Maybe it is building your business by picking up that 300 pound phone. If it is worth doing, then just do it. I guess that creates a "Stonewall Jackson meets Bo Jackson".
Coach John Wooden's name warms the hearts all all basketball fans and coaches. The man defined college basketball through his career. He has inspired coaches, players, fans and people everywhere. I use Coach Wooden's words all the time in my life. And my 2 favorites are:
1. BE QUICK BUT DON'T RUSH
Do NOT fall prey to "paralysis by analysis". This means if the opportunity looks good, then add your favorite cliche..(strike while the iron is hot, opportunity only knocks once, don't look a gift horse in the mouth). A fast pace to life ensures you are not merely existing but experiencing life at its fullest.
2. FAILING TO PREPARE IS PREPARING TO FAIL
That says a lot, doesn't it? This one statement forces a person to accept responsibility for whatever is in their life. I talk to people daily who do not actively seek employment or opportunity yet become frustrated and befuddled that they have no money. What does it take to succeed? Prepare for success and following Stonewall #2 after heeding the Coach's words.
Jesus. I do not feel that He needs much of an introduction. It seems people either love or hate Him. If one looks just at His writings, He offers some amazing advice that if lovers and haters followed, our world would be a better place.
1. LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF
This teaching almost becomes cliche and that is a shame as it loses its power that way. Treat others the way you want treated. Do you want constantly criticized? Do you want people to gossip about you? Do you want people to manipulate you or your feelings? I didn't think so.
2. HEART, MIND, SOUL AND STRENGTH
OK, for the sake of argument, let us apply this to ANYTHING we do in life and not just to loving God. If you go to work, put your heart, soul, mind and strength in it. If you are trying to stop smoking or lose weight, do the same. I don't know about you, but I usually unintentionally miss on one of the four. At work, I may be giving decent effort but my mind is elsewhere one day or my soul is missing from my work another day. I guess this also means do whatever you do to the best of your ability (see now apply Stonewall again)
I could have added a couple of others to the list today. Special consideration goes to Albert Einstein, Paul Finck, Annie Armen and to others who make me think on a daily basis. Stonewall, Coach and Jesus never seemed to understand the lukewarm approach. I, personally, fight the water temperature in my life. I resolve to crank up the heat.
But why and how does that pertain to the title of the blog. I am referring to Stonewall Jackson, John Wooden and, well, Jesus Christ. I suppose that one was a given huh?
Stonewall Jackson, an iconic Confederate General, led an interesting life in addition to many men to victory. To say he was eccentric would be like saying LeBron James plays a little ball. He sucked on lemons, felt pepper was not good for his health and memorized the lectures he gave while teaching. He had a couple of sayings that I think certainly can drive home the importance of effort.
1. MYSTIFY AND MISLEAD THE ENEMY
You will run into naysayers, critics and downright mean people. How you deal with them will determine if you let their evil intentions rob you of your zealous intentions. Remember this Stonewall-ism when we get to the last guy.
2. RESOLVE TO PERFORM WHAT YOU OUGHT; PERFORM WITHOUT FAIL WHAT YOU RESOLVE
So basically, do what you feel is worthy and useful and do not let anyone or anything stop you. Maybe it is an athletic pursuit. Maybe it is looking for a job. Maybe it is building your business by picking up that 300 pound phone. If it is worth doing, then just do it. I guess that creates a "Stonewall Jackson meets Bo Jackson".
Coach John Wooden's name warms the hearts all all basketball fans and coaches. The man defined college basketball through his career. He has inspired coaches, players, fans and people everywhere. I use Coach Wooden's words all the time in my life. And my 2 favorites are:
1. BE QUICK BUT DON'T RUSH
Do NOT fall prey to "paralysis by analysis". This means if the opportunity looks good, then add your favorite cliche..(strike while the iron is hot, opportunity only knocks once, don't look a gift horse in the mouth). A fast pace to life ensures you are not merely existing but experiencing life at its fullest.
2. FAILING TO PREPARE IS PREPARING TO FAIL
That says a lot, doesn't it? This one statement forces a person to accept responsibility for whatever is in their life. I talk to people daily who do not actively seek employment or opportunity yet become frustrated and befuddled that they have no money. What does it take to succeed? Prepare for success and following Stonewall #2 after heeding the Coach's words.
Jesus. I do not feel that He needs much of an introduction. It seems people either love or hate Him. If one looks just at His writings, He offers some amazing advice that if lovers and haters followed, our world would be a better place.
1. LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF
This teaching almost becomes cliche and that is a shame as it loses its power that way. Treat others the way you want treated. Do you want constantly criticized? Do you want people to gossip about you? Do you want people to manipulate you or your feelings? I didn't think so.
2. HEART, MIND, SOUL AND STRENGTH
OK, for the sake of argument, let us apply this to ANYTHING we do in life and not just to loving God. If you go to work, put your heart, soul, mind and strength in it. If you are trying to stop smoking or lose weight, do the same. I don't know about you, but I usually unintentionally miss on one of the four. At work, I may be giving decent effort but my mind is elsewhere one day or my soul is missing from my work another day. I guess this also means do whatever you do to the best of your ability (see now apply Stonewall again)
I could have added a couple of others to the list today. Special consideration goes to Albert Einstein, Paul Finck, Annie Armen and to others who make me think on a daily basis. Stonewall, Coach and Jesus never seemed to understand the lukewarm approach. I, personally, fight the water temperature in my life. I resolve to crank up the heat.
Thursday, May 31, 2012
The NUMBER ONE KEY to Friendship
Of all the resources and all the blogs, the fate of the
Universe and the ONE thing that a friend MUST do will be revealed here today.
There have been countless greeting cards, books and TV movies that depict what
makes a great friend. I know, there have been many catchy tunes that have
revealed secrets of friendship.
Friend has a simple enough definition. The online dictionary
defines friend as “a person attached to another by personal feelings of
affection or regard”. Many, including myself, hold a much deeper definition of
friend. Friends are like 5 pound diamond: rare and extremely valuable. Reaching
“friend” status takes a lot of time and effort, and the effort is well worth
it.
Another concern I have with that store bought definition is
that it eliminates everything except humans. I have had dogs that have lived up
to “man’s best friend” and my son has a stuffed Goofy who could not be a better
friend.
So what is THE secret to being a good friend and what can we
all improve on to strengthen our friendships? What is THE ONE THING?...
Listen
Many people claim to be great listeners and it is a quality
that we all wish we had. Go ahead. Ask some people you know or work with and
ask them what their better qualities are. I bet most will say they are good
listeners. And, when they tell you that, just smile and nod knowing you heard
it from me first.
We are not going to get all complex and breakdown
communication into a 50 page dissertation that also cures insomnia. Most of the
time, topics with big theoretical components rarely make sense in everyday
life. I am cutting this down to the core and will give you sound suggestions
for improving your listening skills. Yes, listening is a skill and needs to be
developed. Listening goes along with participation. Face it. We like “us” and
we want to be the one in the spotlight. Our needs, wants and “don’t wants” come
first and we are told to “look out for number one.” Talking is a selfish act
and listening is mostly a self-less act. Two completely different mind sets
exist here and communication depends on the balance between the two. Now it is
time to divulge the practical guide to effective listening.
1.
SHUT UP
I realize that those words are crude and even banned in some
households, but this is a no holds barred blog post. To be an effective and
caring listener, one has to be quiet and allow the other person to talk.
2.
Get Rid of Distractions
Stop texting, reading or watching TV while someone is
speaking to you. Instead, invest all of your attention on the person needing a
friend. Nothing drives me crazier than someone paying more attention to a text
or any other distraction than to me.
3.
Pay Attention
This is not the same as controlling distractions. Paying
attention means focusing on what is being said to you and not on what your
likely response will be. Do not merely listen to words, but also how the person
speaks and all the nonverbal cues they give in posture, expression and
distance.
4.
Do NOT Judge
Your place as a friend is not to dispense judgment. Finding
someone who is non -judgmental is really difficult. You might have to listen to
someone who does not share your values or ideas. I can tell you if you start
judging, you will stop the much needed communication
5.
Clarify to Prompt More Discussion
Clarifying and confirming what you hear shows the other
person you really ARE listening. Clarification proves important because often a
person just lets loose of what is troubling them and may be hard to follow.
See, 5 easy steps to being a better listener. I know there
are other ways to improve listening and I hope you feel like sharing some tips
in the comments section. Take time and listen to someone today as you never
know if that will be your last interaction with that person.
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Fasting? Bless your heart..
The “bless your heart” thing is a Southern expression that precedes
something less than desirable that must be pointed out to another person. For
example, this has been heard on more than one occasion,
“Fasting? Well. Bless your heart. Are you insane?”…
Few things provoke others to think that you have lost your
mind more than fasting. It just is not natural. Our lives revolve around food.
In our house, the food issue proves even more problematic because of Mathias’
Prader Willi Syndrome. But, even if you do not have a perpetually hungry kid in
your house, the emphasis on food is everywhere.
So, you tell a co-worker that you are not eating lunch
because you are voluntarily fasting, and they look at you with pity. I am not
sure if they feel sorry for my hunger of they feel sorry that I have finally
lost my last thread of sanity. “Experts” come out of the wood work and tell me
fasting is bad for my health (but all the cheeseburgers I have consumed over
the years are BETTER?). After they have exhausted their pity and health
lectures and have determined I may not be insane, they all want to know, “Why?”
That is a legitimate question. I have studied various
authors on the subject and I have done my Biblical research (although I am not
a scholar) and have come up with a mnemonic device to explain my insanity.
F- Facing
challenges or obstacles
A-Attention focused towards God
S-Submission
of the flesh
T-Times of
repentance
I-Increase
receptivity to Divine Intervention
N-No, NO and
NO to temptation
G- Gain
humility
FACING
CHALLENGES
I have
mentioned Paul Finck in the past. He does not see roadblocks, but rather sees
challenges that one needs to conquer. Goodness knows I have a lot of challenges
in my life and I make a boat load of obstacles that get in my own way. I know
that, if left up to me, I am going to make a mess of things. Ask my wife. I
need help facing these challenges so fasting allows me to lean on Jesus and
less on myself.
ATTENTION
TOWARDS GOD
I love this
one. I discovered this during a 40 day fast and I sadly allowed the chaos of
life to get in the way of this. Food is symbolic of life clutter. There are a
few things in which to choose from of solid value and lots of junk available.
With each hunger pain, take a deep breath and draw closer to God.
SUBMISSION
OF THE FLESH
I have
always been a pretty strong guy. This has been problematic as I tend to think I
can handle many things by myself. When I get in a bind, I usually try harder
and that is not smart. Flesh is weak. Period. I may do a whole blog entry on weakness
of the flesh.
TIMES OF
REPENTANCE
Repentant
fasts are common in the Bible. To be truly repentant means to feel so sorrowfully
remorse that it hurts. Too many times we feel sorry for a sin but lack that
deep remorse necessary to impact one’s life. Repentance causes so much pain
that committing the same sin goes against sound judgment. When we hurt that
badly, we should turn to Jesus for comfort. Fasting helps us focus on not only
the repentance but also the healing that follows.
INCREASED RECEPTIVITY
When you are
fasting and leaning on God, you find yourself able to listen to that still
small voice better. As a fast continues, one gives up more and more control and
trusts God more every day. I know, this does not make any sense and I would not
have believed it either if it had not happened to me.
NO, NO and
NO!
Fasting
helps us deal with temptation in so many ways. First, you overcome that
tempting candy bar. Then, you overcome the urge to sneak a little supper. But
the lessons you learn from food can then be applied to bigger and more dominant
temptations in your life. The thing is, God will help you through ALL of the
temptations. But you must be willing to trust Him and really want to avoid the
temptation.
GAIN
HUMILITY
I have not
experienced anything more humbling than a fast. The most obvious to me was the
physical effect of a fast. I exercised throughout my previous fast as I found
that it helped me build psychological, emotional and spiritual strength but I
can tell you my physical strength plummeted, which I found humbling. Endurance,
speed and strength vanished. I cannot emphasize enough to newbie fasters to
expect some serious weakness, especially at the beginning.
There you
have it. If you can spell “fasting” you can come up with reasons for those you
encounter. I have also found it useful to set the end date, look at it, and
then focus on each minute of each day. Lean on Him to get you to the end.
Monday, May 7, 2012
Be the Attitude
Mathias is my youngest child. He was born with Prader Willi Syndrome and he was born with a love of God that I cannot explain. He starts kindergarten in the fall and they want him to write his name and tie his shoes by then. These things may or may not happen, but this 5 year old can explain and understands salvation. He plays "church" like most kids play with trucks. Yesterday, he was curious about Adam and Eve. For those who do not know about Prader Willi Syndrome, Mathias is always hungry because the appetite control center in his brain has a "hard wiring" issue. He does pretty well most days but sometimes he is overcome with hunger and obsesses on food. I told him that Adam and Eve lived in Eden and he misunderstood and thought they were "eating in" and immediately wondered what restaurant they went to way back then.
Last night, he wanted the Bible read to him at bedtime. He loves John the Baptist stories so I read out of Matthew. He was not going to sleep so we made it all the way to the Beatitudes, or Jesus' sermon on the Mount. He laid there and listened and I wondered what he thought of the "attitudes" that Christ taught.
Matthew 5 CEV
3 God blesses those people who depend only on him. They belong to the kingdom
of heaven!
4 God blesses those people
who grieve.
They will find comfort!
5 God blesses those people
who are humble.
The earth will belong
to them!
6 God blesses those people
who want to obey him
more than to eat or drink.
They will be given
what they want!
Wow. I have read this many times but reading it to Mathias put it all in perspective to me. In 3 short verses, Christ summarizes all my blog posts! These qualities are the very ones that I feel God has been laying on my heart for my own life.
Check out verse 6. THAT should be the reason we choose to fast. THAT reason alone because if we really seek to obey and follow Him, the rest of the stuff of life will get in line.
I tell Denise all the time I have no idea what God has in store for Mathias, but that little boy is a kid after His heart. My boy fights giants everyday. It is 6:15AM here and soon I will hear the pitter thump of his feet and know he will want his breakfast and his coffee and I will do my best to help the little guy put on his armor to fight the giant hunger. Hunger here, is not a game, but a nasty enemy that wants to crush my baby boy.
Mathias has a great heart and a great attitude. I feel like whooping up some giants.
What are some of the giants in your life that wreck your "attitude"?
Last night, he wanted the Bible read to him at bedtime. He loves John the Baptist stories so I read out of Matthew. He was not going to sleep so we made it all the way to the Beatitudes, or Jesus' sermon on the Mount. He laid there and listened and I wondered what he thought of the "attitudes" that Christ taught.
Matthew 5 CEV
3 God blesses those people who depend only on him. They belong to the kingdom
of heaven!
4 God blesses those people
who grieve.
They will find comfort!
5 God blesses those people
who are humble.
The earth will belong
to them!
6 God blesses those people
who want to obey him
more than to eat or drink.
They will be given
what they want!
Wow. I have read this many times but reading it to Mathias put it all in perspective to me. In 3 short verses, Christ summarizes all my blog posts! These qualities are the very ones that I feel God has been laying on my heart for my own life.
Check out verse 6. THAT should be the reason we choose to fast. THAT reason alone because if we really seek to obey and follow Him, the rest of the stuff of life will get in line.
I tell Denise all the time I have no idea what God has in store for Mathias, but that little boy is a kid after His heart. My boy fights giants everyday. It is 6:15AM here and soon I will hear the pitter thump of his feet and know he will want his breakfast and his coffee and I will do my best to help the little guy put on his armor to fight the giant hunger. Hunger here, is not a game, but a nasty enemy that wants to crush my baby boy.
Mathias has a great heart and a great attitude. I feel like whooping up some giants.
What are some of the giants in your life that wreck your "attitude"?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)