Thought Control

2:15 AM

Somewhere

Someone's mind (maybe yours)

"What am I going to do? What if that job doesn't come through? How am I going to pay the rent? I should have not quit that other job. That was stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. No wonder I am alone. Who would want to be around me? What am I going to do about my weight? My clothes don't fit. I am so weak. Weak and stupid! Now that is a combination..Geez, it is after 2 AM and I am still awake. I bet I oversleep in the morning. What if I miss that interview?....."

Does this happen to you or anyone else you know? This example is Stinking Thinking on Steroids. In the "biz", we call this rumination. I explain it as how a cow chews a cud. Mentally, we chew and chew only to yak it up and chew it all over again. Sure, I have talked about worry on other posts but today, I am searching for empowerment and control.

Thoughts like I described in the beginning of this blog possess power. There is no denying that thoughts like that control a person. The thoughts control a person's rest pattern (up at 2:15 AM), control one's emotions, and eventually will control one's actions and effort. Thoughts can leave a person exhausted, bewildered, frustrated and defeated. All of this arises from thoughts conceived in your own mind. These thoughts are YOUR WORK. And some of you do not think your thoughts count or have power. Humpf, your thoughts can make or break you. Remember that.

Think of it this way: In the example above, the thoughts are holding the person hostage. In other words, those nasty, hateful thoughts are calling the shots in regards to sleep and esteem. As sleep dwindles, so does solid decision making and as decision making falls apart, so does self esteem. Then a poor self esteem builds more worries and soon you are hold on to the horse on the "merry go 'round" of worry and rumination...step right up for another free ride!!!

ENOUGH! This blog has never, and will never, apologize for its Christian base. I do not care if I ever gain more than 12 followers. (I do appreciate you guys that do read me though). Last night, at a local service, a testimony talked about taking thoughts captive. Here are 2 versions of that verse (2 Corinthians 10:5)

2 Corinthians 10:5

Contemporary English Version (CEV)

⁵ and every bit of pride that keeps anyone from knowing God. We capture people’s thoughts and make them obey Christ.

2 Corinthians 10:5

New International Version (NIV)

⁵ We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.

Wow, instead of our thoughts holding us hostage, we are instructed here to take the thoughts captive and make THEM obedient to Christ. I think it was bold of Paul to put it this way. Remember, in his day, every time a nation was overtaken, the survivors became captive slaves. I would think that being held captive was a particularly frightening reality. By informing us that we had the right and obligation to take those nasty thought and put them away, Paul educates Christians then and now not to tolerate crappy thoughts any longer.

What thoughts can we hold captive? Of course we can hold those sinful thoughts captive and get them out of our thinking pattern. You know the ones I am talking about-the ones that you feel ashamed that you have but they keep coming back anyways. Paul also means any thought provided by the enemy that makes a person feel less than how God intended you to be. I have heard it said, "God does not make junk".

Earlier I told you to remember that your thoughts can make or break you. I am sure you all acknowledged times in your life where your thoughts broke you down and defeated you. But, if you agree that thoughts can BREAK you, then you must accept that thoughts can MAKE YOU. THOUGHTS CAN MAKE YOU. It is as simple as ABC--To achieive, you must believe what you conceive.

I am begging to be a big believer in affirmations. You must believe that you are unique and special. Those of you that really know me understand if I was there with you, I would reaffirm that you are special and have wonderful, God given and blessed traits. I still fall prey to the thinking at the beginning of the blog. I talk to myself in these blogs as much as I do to anyone else. So, take those nasty thoughts, lock them up and beat them down if the resist.

Life is a Bycycle Ride

Sunday, October 28, 2012
0430

This is the time I started my Sunday morning ride. I am really fortunate that the young man who lives with us part time has a great bike he lets me use. I thought I had died and gone to heaven the first time I rode his Trek because all I had ever ridden were discount bikes. Heck, the cost of all my bikes together MIGHT buy a new tire for his Trek. I have been rediscovering the joy and exercise of riding a bike for a few weeks now. This morning, the plan was to ride 30 miles as I completed 25 miles last Sunday.

I go outside, turn my headlight on and my blinking seat and take out on my journey. Tropical storm Sandy, even though she is on the East Coast, provided us with the winds and gusts down here in South West Florida. I will be honest, about 3 miles into the trip, I was ready to turn around and call a 6 day trip a success. As I rationalized this lame decision, a still, small voice in my head said, "Go ahead; you always take the easy way out eventually."

I did the entire 30 miles as I planned. I fought headwinds, rejoiced in tail winds, and had an great workout. As I rode, I was enlightened on how a bike ride mimics life. This is what I came up with as I peddled a long way from home.

Sometimes, the trip of life is hard. As I peddled and ran into a strong gust of wind, my stroke would slow down, my legs would burn and I would slow down to a snail's pace. There I was, putting forth a good effort when the wind hit me and made me miserable. I was going nowhere and the sustained, leg burning effort started to become frustrating. Life does this, too. You get up, put in the same effort you did the last day of your "Groundhog's Day" life, and a gust of life hits you in the face.

Maybe it is the car giving you troubles. Maybe your kid has temporarily lost their mind and made a choice that makes no sense but affects your life. I can tell you from personal experience, a bike ride burns my legs, but life burns me somewhere a little more sensitive.

Sometimes, you have to change gears. Bad days require extra effort to say the least. In life, we find ourselves grinding it out during those terrible moments. Ever had a migraine headache and no sick days? Days like that make you gut one out for the team. A person just gears down and pushes through the obstacle or mountain life has thrown. On the other hand, when things are going great, jump into that higher gear and things really begin t take off for you.

Sometimes, you can coast. Slow down and smell the roses. The day is going well and you have some extra time, money or energy (Or on a special day, all 3). Coasting on a bike allows you to cover ground and not exert any energy to do it. I do not coast much as I am trying to use biking for exercise, but there are benefits when I do. First of all, I use a coast to stand up and get out of the saddle. My butt tends to like coasting. Secondly, I can really focus in on the scenery around me when I am coasting. For me, I ride in the dark and I never get tired of looking at the stars and the sky. Coasting in life allows one to take the pressure off on those things that are pains in your butt (see, I said bike riding and life are the same!)

If you give up before your final destination, you will never get there. Many times, the head winds of life cause us to give up on our dreams. It becomes too hard, the mountain  too steep and the ride of life consumes too much energy. Instead of getting through the situation, we merely come out of the saddle and give up. I see 2 reasons to come out of the saddle. You can either come out just before you quit, or you can come out to put some real power in the stroke. It is easy to give up and takes courage to keep on going, even when it looks bleak and tiring.

So we know life is a highway (which has run through my mind since this idea came to me). Push through and look forward to coasting.

Diggin up Bones

You ever known a kid who absolutely struggles with school? This kid aces the academics but cannot handle the social aspects. It is a guy who is so painfully shy that it becomes obvious as nervousness overcomes him. He gets tongue tied, he gets sweaty and anxious, and physically he becomes a wreck. His reaction to stress, which may be as minor as talking to a girl, causes others to take notice and laugh or poke fun at him. As a result, the boy stays far away from all dances and bonfires. He defines "socially awkward".

I was that guy. I can still remember girls laughing and poking fun at me just to see me blush or sweat. And, believe me, I can name names if I need to as I certainly have not forgotten the pain. When the rest of my friends were dating, I shot free throws in my driveway. As a result, after a period of warm up, I can still ht between 5-8 BACKWARD free throws. This is a skill without a lot of applicability in life, however.

I finally and slowly overcame shyness. I have devoted a lifetime and a career helping people to the best of my ability. I have spent a lifetime helping people seek out their inner beauty when they do not see it through the veil of life's pain. Most days, I do not even think about the painful past, but I have to admit I really have no desire to do anything associated with former high school "buddies".

Last night, out of the blue, I was insulted on a social media site. Someone from "those days" inferred that I was never and would never be attractive. OK, I can see that evidence in the mirror, but this person has no idea what my inner attractiveness may be. You see, they did not speak to me back then to assess the "real" me and they have no idea what makes me tick today. I guess I did not let this water run off my back like I normally do. In some of the settings in which I have worked (prison, state hospitals) I have been called some pretty inventive names. But, last night some bones were dug up close to Halloween.

How do we deal with stuff like that when it arises?

1. Avoid the primal response. As I re-read the comment made the second time (the first time I was shocked and did not absorb it all), my mind conjured up some not so nice quick responses that most would admit they would entertain. What good would that response do? None. Instead, I simply mentioned that I did not appreciate an insult that apparently aged like cheese for 30 years.

2. Understand that people will always be critical. It does not matter how much I feel I have helped people and how I think my life's work matters to mankind, man (or woman) possess individual agendas and motives that are in no way connected to me. Expressing them, I suppose, is cheaper than the therapy they may need.

3. "To thine own self, be true". My life continues despite someone's opinion. Yes, I look back at the experiences from middle and high school with great disdain. To me, it is like thinking about last year's stomach flu. I am glad its over and never want to experience it again.

I would be a liar if I said the comment did not bother me. It did cost me a few minutes of sleep.This morning, it motivates me to look deeper inside myself and really see what I am. Things, big or small, helpful or hurtful, happen for a reason.

Less weight=less depresion

I have put my big mouth to the test and have made a public challenge to lose 100 pounds. I know, what was I thinking? No more cakes and pies. No more "good stuff" that makes me feel so bad. Ugh. Another one of those things in life that a person has to give up, even if they enjoy it.

In order to try and keep myself motivated, I thought I would look at the reasons I decided to to this. I have worked most of my life in the mental health field. I have seen thousands of people suffer from depression. Since I have been a nurse since 1986, I have seen thousands and thousands of people who suffered from obesity. I see this one guy every single day. He looks back at me from the mirror. Do not tell him, but I noticed he has a bit of a growing bald spot too.

Are depression and obesity related? For this, I went to the medical literature data base called "Pubmed". I am not an affiliate and I do not get a penny from them, but this is my "go to" site for information. The search alone for "obesity depression" landed 3458 references. That tells me there MIGHT be an association of the two.

A study is cited from the Finnish Research Center for Sport and Health Science. The abstract looks at the presence of low grade inflammation and depression as it pertains to ABDOMINAL FAT. Seriously, are there two more horrible words than "ABDOMINAL FAT"? Call me any name you want, just do not call me "Abdominal Fat". The study supports that the two evil doers (inflammation and depression) put a guy at more risk to develop "AF". I cannot help but digress a bit more down the road as it reminds me of the movie "Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid", when Steve Martin hears "cleaning woman"...

Abdominal fat leads to even more medical problems as it has been linked to increased incidence of diabetes and cardiac disease. But, the good news is found in Pubmed. The following is from an abstract found in the American Journal of Psychiatry September 2011 edition (hey, see, I bring you the BEST information)

"The association of depressive symptoms with subsequent inflammation levels was eliminated after adjustment for health behaviors associated with depression-physical inactivity, smoking, and higher body mass index."

So, in other words, if a body gets physically fit, then depression will have the possibility to improve. Depression affects the lives of so many on so many levels. Anything that helps battle depression makes a difference. Now, I changed my search criteria just a bit. I did a search for "childhood obesity". Sadly, it registered 7921 hits. We often hear about the impact now and the future impact of childhood obesity. Considering what we covered in this blog, realize that depression will have a great foothold on our future as a country.

I know it is election time and we are forced to listen to all of the politicians spout off the thought of the day. We can take control of healthcare by taking it on one person at a time and go after obesity with a vengeance. I will help you. I am not one of those skinny people who preach about the evils of obesity. I live with the disease daily and am fighting it pretty hard these day.

I hope this educates one person.

John

3 Ways to Combat Disappointment

I have an idea for a great vacation. I want to go to Vancouver Island and spend a week hiking and camping in the woods looking for Bigfoot. I want to do the night hikes, the calls, the wood knocking and spend time kayaking around the island. To me, this sounds like an amazing adventure. To my surprise, when I mention this plan to my wife Denise, she politely listens and then says in a calm, quiet manner, "No." It does not sound like much fun to her and she is sure the kids would not like it either. And after reflection, I am not sure how I would deal with the 50 pounds of cheese we would need to go with all the "whine" Denise, Madi and Mathias would be serving. My point is, even though it seemed perfect to me (still does BTW), my vision was not shared by my family.

Daily I talk to people who are disappointed. They are disappointed in themselves or they are disappointed in someone else. Many times, this disappointment leads to arguments, tears and sadly, bloodshed. When people are disappointed, they feel let down, betrayed or ignored. I never claimed to be a genius, but being let down, betrayed and ignored do not rank highly on the ways people want to feel. Now, utilizing my familiar Stooges Rule (3 things or bullet points to a topic), I will share 3 ways to combat disappointment.

1. Do NOT place your dreams, ideas or expectations on someone else's behavior. My idea of a vacation is not shared as fun or worthwhile. Have you ever heard anyone say, "I did not like the way they treated me at that party."? The person slighted them or maybe poked fun of them in front of someone they were hoping to impress. The slighted person gets angry and hurt because they thought the other person was their friend or had their back. What happened is that a person became hurt over the actions of another they could not control. You want your kid to be a brain surgeon? All parents want their kids to succeed but remember that some kids want to be the best starving artist they can be. In other words, do not define another person's success based on your standards. If you have underaged children, of course this doe not fully apply: they will do as you say, when you say...(sarcasm intended)

2. Make sure your vision is not clouded. Perception can be seriously impacted by cloudy or foggy conditions. This is where I ask you to stretch your comfort zone. Our cloudy vision often occurs without out knowledge. Years and years of experiences-some good, some bad- lead to conclusions that we rarely challenge. For years, I assumed that the Bible says a person will go to Hell if they commit suicide. That statement is nowhere to be found in the Holy Bible. People feel that network marketing is an illegal pyramid scheme but the truth is a few bad business apples have ruined the perception of the industry. I personally know some very genuine people who are living a dream lifestyle helping others. Open your mind to possibilities as long as those possibilities are legal, ethical and moral. I also recommend that the ideas also fall in line with your core spiritual values.

3. DO NOT accept expectations placed on you that are not in YOUR interest. People want to control other people. It is human nature. Anxiety rises when a person tries to meet the expectations of another that they just cannot meet. Insecurity begins to blossom and then all of a sudden, a person has a bumper crop of insecurity. Again, the boundaries must be defined by ethics, legality and morality. As Billy Shakes said, "To thine own self be true." Strive to meet your OWN expectations. If others do not like this approach, they need to read #1.

Today, you will either place an expectation on yourself or someone else. Chances are, an expectation or two may not be met. It is not the end of the world. It is merely a new staring point. Success has more than one path and surely more than one definition.

Good or bad, happy or sad..

Psalm 42 :11 "Why am I discouraged?
                          Why am I restless?
                                                    I trust you!
                          And I will praise you again
                                                        because you help me,
                                                        and you are my God. 

The last post disclosed my favorite professional catch phrases that I tend to use, and sometimes, over use. As a Christian, I believe we have "catch phrases" that roll off out tongue without any deep thought or consideration. Sadly, one of those may be "praise the Lord".

If any of you have ever seen the movie "Facing the Giants", you will recall when the Cinderella high school team lost a heartbreaking game, the coach told his players to praise God in defeat just as they would in victory. And, as the movie goes, an amazing second chance happened for the team and the loss did not count. The movie had a happy ending, just as one would expect from a Christian based film. I believe with all of my being that because I am a Christian, there will be a happy ending for me in eternity. It is the basic foundation of my Faith.

As humans, we struggle with a lot of plot twists in route to our happy ending. Sure, it is easy and natural to praise God when we are scoring touchdowns and much harder to do when we fumble in life or when we fall short. It is easy to praise Him when the day is going great and much more difficult to do when we wake up at 3 AM and immediately we feel the heartache and depression that reminds us we are in fact alive. Praising God is what we need to be doing when the back pain makes us miserable and legs and hips hurt and ache when we sit, stand or lay down. We should be praising Him when we dread our "dream" job because, well, nightmares are dreams, too. It is easy to praise God when we see our young child smile and laugh but is it as easy when we know we have an estrangement from another child who barely has spoken to us in 5 years? 

When we confidently conquer any challenge in our life, saying "Praise the Lord" flows off our tongue without effort. When we are drowning in self doubt, disappointment and fear, do those words ring true in our heart and roll off our tongues? Is that not when we should be praising  Him and praying more? Instead, as the carnage of life piles up, we become more distant and distracted from leaning on Him. Our failures and mistakes cloud our vision.

Heartache, physical pain, depression and disappointments are all part of the package of being human and as I said before, prove we are alive. The fact that we are alive gives us hope, even if it is a speck in an ocean of doubt, fear, worry, stress, and a million other experiences we would rather not face individually, not to mention in unison. Hope should immediately provoke praise that flows freely and more than counters the negative junk we are experiencing.

So (there is my word again), what do we do when everything that happens only complicates the bleak situation and produces more pain, depression, frustration, and uncertainty? In keeping it real, what do we do when the job stinks, finances are scary, and the bitter taste of defeat and failure makes you sick? For me, I am going to praise God, put on my running shoes, and force myself to remember that God loves me when things are good or bad, happy or sad, and that the glint of hope I can see through the fog of life proves that He is not done with me yet.

My top 4 "professional" catch phrases

I never realized that I in fact had certain catch phrases. I am constantly trying to improve my professional skills so I pay attention and analyze my choice of words. One habit I am working on is the overuse of "so". I use it to continue professional assessments and continue the flow of a conversation. I really over use "so" and that is a focal point of my continual quality improvement. So (doh!) that being said, I have also discovered I have 4 catch phrases I use pretty frequently. Additionally, I mockingly use one of Dr. Phil's (BTW, not a fan).."How's that working for ya?"

"It is what it is.". Ah, I really like this one and it was introduced to me by one of my friends. Then, I went to work in corrections and I found that it is used all the time by everyone. For me, I think the phrase means that you are given a situation and you must take it at face value.  Eckhart Tolle, a respected teacher and author, wrote "Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you have chosen it.". Both phrases have the same inherent meaning. Take a situation for what it is and then, if you want to change it, do something to force a change. "It is what it is" does not allow for a person to assume the role of a victim. It merely assesses that new starting point of a situation that requires attention. For instance (I had to erase "so"), my tire goes flat on the truck. I hate it, but "it is what it is" and I make a plan to fix the tire.


"How do you eat an elephant?" Of course the answer is one bite at a time. I see a great number of people that have excessive and uncontrollable worry and stress. They want to conquer the world and wanted to do that 3 days ago. Don't get me wrong, I think setting goals is a great thing but people (including me) have to be patient and take the goal in smaller steps. Break down the big goal (elephant) and break it down into 'bite-sized' portions. This also brings me in a first runner up of Hipes Catch Phrases by using "Inch by inch is a cinch and yard by yard it's hard."

Perception is reality. If I think that the weather is too hot, there will be someone who thinks it is too cool. Although I know they are wrong, I must admit that, to them, it is too cold. Each of us sees a situation in a different light. Again, I see this in my professional work when a person may acknowledge the countless faults of their spouse, but dismiss them and feel that their spouse is perfect for them. I canot convince you that my perception is your reality.

Limits exist only in the mind. This one has been on my mind a lot since I challenged myself to lose 100 pounds in 100 days.Wow did that bring the people out of the woodwork telling me that it was unsafe and impossible without risking my health. My morbid obesity threatens my health everyday and how many people has gastric bypass yearly? In the 1950s, it was believed that no one could run a mile under 4 minutes.Cars were not supposed to catch on either, as well as planes and computers. WE place limits on our lives and situations. My God knows know limits. Nothing has been too big for God. I am indeed focused on making it to 100 pounds in 100 days.


Do any of you have any catch phrases? Do you have any words you just use too much?

You have done it now!

I write a blog to rid my mind of the many thoughts that bounce around in there. I write my blog to help anyone that I can. I am, by nature, a nurturer. I have belonged to the sisterhood of nursing since 1986. Honestly, I think I would love to stop being a nurturer but unsure if I can do that.

In the last 10 years, I have met and talked to some people who have made me think deeply. Some of those people have been those I was supposed to help and bless but they helped and blessed me. Some have been co-workers who have expand my ability to see a situation. And a couple have been higher profile individuals who remain pretty real despite their success. Two, in particular, encourage others to seek their passion and the money will follow. In a sense, if you do what you really love, then the rest will take care of itself. They proclaim that if you are making a living doing something you love and would ordinarily do because it is fun, then work will not seem like work. Paul Finck and Annie Armen are motivators with different styles--like Sanchez and Tebow. I know, the Jets are not having a great year but both qbs have been successful and both are different.

Now I have gone and done it. Not by comparing Paul to Sanchez and Annie to Tebow, but by sitting here and typing this, I am finally jumping off into the deep end of the pool. My LIFE, PROFESSION and REPUTATION are at stake.

I posted this on Facebook a second ago:

Some of you know, I dabble in a blog. Yesterday, I shared some views about accountability strategies for changes we want in our life. Little did I know that Mathias would have an epically horrible day at school yesterday. Both Denise and I know he will struggle throughout his life with behavior and with his weight. Funny how one can locate one's inner hypocrite during quiet reflection. I am going out on a branch of the limb of the tree that I am not sure can support me. In a sense, I am yelling from the mountaintop that NOW is the time I begin a serious battle against my personal obesity because I am a walking and talking hypocrite to a little boy who will be nagged, monitored and chastised for his weight. January 18 will be a Friday and is 100 days away. I will weigh 100 pounds less than I do 
 now.

Sure the goal sounds like a bit much. I will separate the chaff from the wheat and see who are my real supporters and those who, well, aren't. How does my challenge apply to my passion? If you ever want bored for hours, let me sit and talk to you about fitness, health, and exercise. I am the mega-nerd when it comes to that stuff. Geez, I got a 100% on my nutrition final in college, a sad but true statement. During these 100 days, I am viewing myself as my own client and I am aiming to seek completing of the American Council of Exercise (ACE) certification as a Health Coach. THAT is my professional passion. That is where I feel I have been given gifts.

So, now, I sit back and see who stands with me and who does not.

Accountability WIth a Twist

No one could ever accuse me of seeing the world in a cookie cutter way. If the first step is acknowledgement, then I accept that I am not right, or as they say back home, "I ain't right.". Even though I am a bubble and a half off plumb, I need goals and I certainly need accountability.

I possess an advanced degree in procrastination. It took me a while to get that degree as I kept putting off the work. In a sense, that caused me to receive the degree with honors. Obviously, it comes into play in meeting any business dream I might have. I could go on and bore you with hours of details showing how I have put off doing things. Why do I put things off like I do? I am not totally sure. Maybe part of me enjoys misery, stress and worry. I am certain that fear puts me down all the time. Yesterday, the Biblical parable of the servants and talents hit me like a ton of bricks. FEAR kept the one servant from investing or taking care of the 'talent' (asset) that the master gave to him. FEAR led him to be called "lazy" and, as the CEV states, "good for nothing". If any of you are like me and fight esteem issues, the last thing I need is my prowess of procrastination prompting someone to call me 'lazy'.

I am a great dreamer and goal setter. I find following through difficult because of fear and some other things. I have brainstormed a few unique ways to encourage accountability.

1. Tell others your goal. I do not mean just write it down in a journal (a great idea, by the way). I mean yell it from the mountaintops, or better yet, post it on the modern day mountain tops-Facebook and/or Twitter. Lay it out there. See who the supporters are in your life and weed out the haters. If your dream or goal means that much to you and you add in your post a simple "why" statement, then your true friends and supporters will be unable to at least click "like". Silence speaks volumes and those who do not respond are merely nosey and not what you need.

2. Use your common SENSE(S) This is where it gets unique to the inner workings of my mind. Senses guide our life and much of this guidance is done without any conscious thought. You smell and see the "HOT NOW" sign on the Krispy Kreme store and your mouth and stomach get the message immediately. Why not use that sense recognition for good?

Let's look at a "body" goal. People have used motivational pictures of how they want to look for years and visualization has long been encouraged. The sense of sight helps out here in the quest for the beach worthy body. How about smell? One could easily keep a bottle of coconut scented tanning oil nearby so a quick snort could keep them on track. Sense of sound is included with simple affirmations repeated that one finds encouraging. The sense of taste proves a little trickier. Sure, a mouth full of sand would prompt visions of the beach, but instead, savoring and enjoying the tastes of healthy food. If you do not find healthy food attractive, I know a way to change that..And finally, the sense of touch. I see this one with huge potential. How about a simple band around your wrist? You feel it and that could hold you accountable when after that dang brownie jumped right into your hand. I have heard of people shaving their heads as a reminder that they need to be focused.

There you have it. A couple simple ways to help with accountability. There are other, more traditional ways, like finding an accountability partner and the aforementioned journaling. In a couple of days, I am putting this to the test in a very public way.

Ready, set ACTION

Roll up your sleeves, tighten your belt and take a big snort of ammonia, it is time to get things started. You and I want change, but not change for change sake. We want a defined change and we want that change to redefine our life. Since we want the change, then all we have to do is say "poof" and it will happen. OK, that was far fetched a bit so all we have to do is pray about it and God will make it happen. Again, God is not a Genie in a bottle nor is He Santa Claus. Well, dang, the easy, no sweat ways won't work so how do we take action.

By now, you know I like things that run in threes--Stooges, strikes, Musketeers, etc. As for taking action, yep, I have got a 3 step plan.

DREAM
All good action plans begin with a dream. I find that people (including me) tend to dream way to small. The best part of a dream is that it can be huge. There should be no limits to a dream. Take for instance a bench press. Let's say that you have 100 workouts in a year and you start at a reasonable weight. In most gyms or the weights sold in stores, the smallest weights available are 2.5 pounds. The weight you select is easy enough to do 10 times without much effort. Every other workout, you put the weight equivalent to a sack of sugar on the bar. In other words, you will add 5 pounds every other workout (or 50 workouts) in a year. In theory, that would yield a 250 pound increase. Now some of you are screaming, "John that is not possible." I ask you to tell me why it is impossible. What if you only reached half that amount a year (125 pound increase) and you did this for 2 years (the same impossible weight in 2 years). Again, even if you only met that by 50% you will still have a 190 pound increase in 2 years. I have heard people say "shoot for the stars and you may still hit the moon". Do not suppress your dreams. And write them down. We will learn how to use that against you later.

GOALS
From dreams come goals. I see goals as the stepping stones to reach your dreams. Setting goals deserves a full blog to do it justice. Goals must be small, measurable and obtainable and once they are reached, can serve as a springboard for the next goal. The old adage "Inch by inch is a cinch and yard by yard is hard" fits here. Maybe the goal is to read your Bible 10 minutes a day. This may seem like an insurmountable goal but build on what you can do. For instance, maybe it is read a chapter a day and increase a chapter every week. It will be no time that you are reading those 10 minutes or more. I had a patient once that said she could not get out of bed in the morning. She started by setting the alarm and forcing herself to walk out of the bedroom. Sure, for a week or so she immediately crashed on the couch but she applied the same approach and eventually found herself walking to the mailbox. Her "dream" is to walk with her husband in the mornings and she is a lot closer than she was in the beginning.

RESOLVE
Good ol' Stonewall Jackson comes in again to save the day. As mentioned in previous entries, I do like me some Stonewall. "Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve". This sort of explains New Years Resolutions. We START with the dream and the goal, and then resolve to make the change. For me, they usually last until about 9pm New Year's Day. Resolve takes, well, resolve. Resolving to change takes hard work and dare I say, accountability. Accountability requires creativity and the next blog will show some creative ways that I plan on injecting accountability into my life.

What are your dreams? Can you manufacture goals to reach them? Then what are you willing to do to reach your dreams (that is where we get stuck)

It's easy as A B C..lifestyle, that is.,,

I am channeling my young, inner Mike Jackson here and going to simplify my approach to a healthy life style. The framework for my "being" is defined by this blog. A person has 4 distinct dimensions: Heart, soul, mind, and body. The simple ABCs will be applied to each of the dimensions. All that discussion is gravy so let's get to the meat and potatoes of today, which is the ABC.

A lifestyle change is a big deal. Heck, just about any change more involved than changing underwear can be a big deal. Change, or the process of change, alters life. When a young 18 year old goes off to college and is introduced to freedom, they end up dancing on a table wearing a lampshade. When a young couple gets married and have to live with another person and share the same bathroom, that change affects them. True change in a young marriage comes when the passing of gas flows freely without inhibition between the 2 parties.

I digress. It is suffice to say without any more flatus innuendos that change of any kind needs a plan or format. We all learned our ABCs at an early age. We can usually remember our ABCs. I will take advantage of that and explain the needed parts of a lifestyle change.

A. "A" is for the Action that is required. For instance, the Body Dimension requires action in the form of activity in order to thrive. Action makes things happen. Things happening result in change. There are certainly barriers to action, like fear, low self esteem or a lack of confidence.

B. "B" is for the Balance needed to keep the peace. Just like Yin and Yang, Scooby and Shaggy, and Peace and Quiet, there must be a balance in a lifestyle. Too much emphasis in one of the 4 dimensions means that another dimension will suffer. Then your dimension will look like one of those guys in the gym who have bench pressed heavily for years but the thought the squat rack was for decoration. The "upper body giants" look ridiculous when they wear shorts. Zoiks!!

C. "C" means Consistency. I can raise my hand and say AMEN when I talk about the previous inconsistent changes I have made in my life. I have been consistently inconsistent in regards to diet, exercise and a million other projects.Consistency, when done appropriately, naturally builds in accountability.

See, as easy as ABC..I will resist the Michael Jackson puns I could throw out there. In upcoming blogs, I will dig deeper into the application of the ABCs.